9/11

I found this documentary on the internet today. Thought it was very interesting, and as skeptical as I am, I found it believable. The quality is poor and it's an hour long, but if you have the time, you might find it interesting to.

Dilemma

Atrocity! Atrocity!
A crime has been committed here, you see.
While asleep on my bed.
someone wrote upon my head.
With permanent ink or magic marker.
This cursed word only gets darker.
S-T-U-P-I-D. You see?
Who could have done this?
I think......ME

Makes me wanna.....

To Public Enemy No.1:

Hey, don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head
You feel left out or looked down on
Just try your best, try everything you can
And don't you worry what they tell themselves
When you're away

It just takes some time, little girl
You're in the middle of the ride
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be all right, all right.

Madagascar

"What is a simple bite on the buttox amongst friends?"-King Julian XIII

Beloved Apollo, for what trespass are we banished?

Hell(Texas) has frozen over!...

Yesterday I locked the keys in my truck, while it was running. The reason I left it running was because I was afraid the truck wouldn't restart once I turned it off, as the battery was shot. It took half an hour in the freezing rain to pry the window open. This compounded by the fact that I had also left my gloves in the cab.

My troubles have only begun...

After dropping the kids off at their mom's, I attempt to restart the truck...Nothing!
A few choice words later( followed by a pissed off stare into the bleak nothingness that surrounds my soul), I walk over to the apartment where a local systemite agrees to drive me down to the auto parts store so I can exchange the truck battery for a new one.
The trek to O'rielly's was a perilous one. We stuck to the access roads to avoid icy overpasses and flyovers. We pass one wreck after another. Still we push on. The police have the upper deck of the highway closed off along with the road in front of the auto parts store. This truly was a night of mayhem....I cautiously grip the hilt of the Katana at my side. We find an alternate entrance.
At the store I exchange the battery, pick up some new wiper blades, and get some de-icing spray( worthless). I figured I was forgetting something but, couldn't remember what. So we returned home and finished the cold-wet-dark job of reinstalling the battery. Sleep was sweet.

Salvation on thin ice....

I wake up at 6:15...Late! Rush down the slick stairs and to the truck. Quickly I spray the windows with de-icer. It only leaves the windows cloudy. I start the truck and proceed to drive with my head partially out the window Ace Ventura style.
Most of the motorist around me are driving a cautious 45 mph , but I'm making great time whizzing in and out of traffic. My attention is drawn to the "check gauge" light on the instrument panel. It was then that I notice the temperature meter is completely in the red. Oh f@#k! I pull over to the shoulder, witch is basically an ice patch, and slide for about 50 feet. Once out, I pop the hood. Sure enough, the radiator was frozen!"Oh God please don't let the head be cracked". Meanwhile, tractor trailers and cars a flying passed. I realize that I'm in an extremely dangerous spot, so I wait for the engine to cool a little and move to a gas station at the next exit.
At the gas station I start filling cups up with hot water from the coffee machine and then pore them into the radiator , while letting it drain out the bottom side. I did this for the next hour. Inquisitive gas station customers would ask me what I was doing. I'd have to explain myself over and over. A mechanic approached me and said that I would have to get it towed to a dealership, where they would have to leave it in the garage for four or five hours before it would defrost sufficiently. He laughed when I asked if hot water would do the trick."I'll show you...Stupid mechanic".
I had to walk over to the next gas station to get some antifreeze, as they had sold out. The Indian clerk wanted 10 bucks for a gallon of premixed anti-freeze and water."It is precisely the best you can get", he said. "It's rated for temperatures of -34 degrees". I just need something for like 20 degrees. "sounds a lot like price gauging" I thought.
Once back at the truck I filled the radiator up and said a default prayer."God, if you love me....Or at least admire me...Or just feel sorry for me, then please don't let the head be cracked". I started the engine then watched the gauge. It stayed cool!
Yes!!!!
I guess God does love me!!..Or at least admires me!.. Or just feels sorry for me.

Catch me if you can.

After much deliberation, I have concluded that the only hobby I can afford right now is running.
So It starts, tomorrow at 5 am...Ok maybe 5:15, I will hit the streets. Donned in my newly acquired jogging pants and a sweater or two, I will run with vigor( I'd better... It's freezing out there). Try and catch me now.....you bastard creditors!

Oh the Welsh!

It seems a Welsh inventor has come up with a contraption that emits a sound at a very high frequency. Apparently, most people over the age 30 can't hear sound at this frequency, and the product is being used to keep loitering teenagers away from malls and stores. We under 30ers have had a product for keeping old people away for quite some time now. It's a little thing called Rock!
Anyway, I hear the Welsh government is working on a proto-type of this teenage repelling device that can be mounted on the posterior of the local sheep. It would be a godsend really!

Blues

It’s all wrong, but it’s all right.
The way that you treat me baby.
Once I was strong but I lost the fight.
You won’t find a better loser.

Hot hot heat has me beat.

Went down to Emo's last night to see the HHH. Found out that they didn't come on 'till 12 a.m. It wouldn't be a big deal except I'm a working stiff, have to leave the house by 6:30 for work. We had already bought the tickets so we stayed.
During the show feisty little Charlock in a desperate attempt to be noticed, was trying to squeeze her way to the stage, to no avail( although if she wanted to she could be the perfect groupie). So I being a gentlemanly barbarian, obliged to hoist her on my shoulders. This wouldn't have been a bad idea except that this required using muscles that have been unused for quite sometime. I can already feel the soreness settling in.
The Hot Hot Heat put on an awesome show. We didn't get home 'till around 2 a.m., but it was worth it.

Happy ThanksG!

I hope all had a great National Day of Gluttony! A day for all to engorge themselves (and for bringing families together).
For those that didn't get enough, we set aside today, and gave it the name "Black Friday". A day for the best of us to debase ourselves by waiting greedily in line all night to "save" usually on cheap electronics. I have heard countless horror ridden tales of desperation,lies, treachery and false advertising.
I hope that I will able to spend all the coming Black Fridays sleeping-in, nursing a wicked hangover.

Oath

I make a vow to the remaining gods that I shall clean my room.........tomorrow.
I'd better! (mom will be over for thanksgiving)

Library Card.

Went down and got me a certified library card. Once the appropriate paper work was filled out I received my brand-new shiny card. The only dilemma was I couldn't figure out what I wanted to read. So much to choose from...... Any suggestions?

Chinee takee outee

Today I am no longer a delivery boy.....I'm a delivery Man! Actually no, after a year and a half of delivering Chinese food every weekend I finally quit. The price will be steep but....all work and no play( yada yada).
Now the great question is what will I do with the time? Thinking of(dare I say it) a hobby. I was thinking of buying a kayak and exploring the river ways. I could get into rock climbing , although I'd have to find a rock worthy of climbing first. I could drink a lot of mountain dew and become Xtreme. Start hang gliding, mountain unicycling, base jumping, etc.( chicks love that crap....I think)....Or I could just clean my room...Fat chance!

Aslan is on the move!

Hark! All ye he beavers!(and she beavers)The mighty Aslan arrives in less than a month. Guess I'd better go down and buy a tent..... Hmmm I wonder why they aren't making a movie of the Wheel of time? (such lamo nerds).

Bed half made.

I finally forced myself to finish the bed frame I started over a month ago. I'm over half done. After making a few cuts with the power saw I realized that it was after 9:30 pm and I was making way too much noise.
The bed did come out looking a little taller than expected. Oh well, just another reason to stop sleepwalking.

Note to self :

Some say I'm losing too much weight.
Advice from wise friend: "Eat more, poop less."

1984

I came across this old pic the other day. Seems like a life time ago! How did my old man ever get the ladies?

Little Lord Systemite

The Holidays are almost here! It's always a wonderful time. It makes you count your blessings and want to do "good deeds" like making cookies for poor orphan street children!



Little greedy systemites can seldom be trusted though! As soon as you turn your head, they'll rob you blind!

Vedder says it better!

To all those we miss:

"Around The Bend"

i'm wishing you a-well
mind at peace within your cell
covers up, i cast you off
i'll be watching as you breathe
i lie still, you move
i send you off around the bend
i hold your head deep in my arms
my fingertips they close your eyes
off you dream, my little child
there's a sun around the bend (yes)
there's a sun around the bend
all the evenings close like this
all these moments that i've missed
please forgive me, won't you, dear?
please forgive and let me share...with you around the bend
you're an angel when you sleep
how i want your soul to keep
on and on around the bend

Primal beings

Last night I walked in my sleep. I haven't done it in a long time, but when I woke this morning I was on the floor. The weird thing was that I had my blanket and pillow with me. My back was pried up against the door as if I had been trying to stop something or someone from entering. I had a feeling that I was there for an important purpose. It sort of reminded me of when that game I used to play as a kid. The one where you make yourself hyperventilate and pass out and when you slowly awake, you feel like you've been there forever. Anyway, some would swear I suffer from mild schizophrenia. I would disagree ( I would agree!).

A little idea.

Here's a little ditty I wrote . ( Jason, you can write a song on NotePad.)

Lessons lost on dynamics of dynamos.
Hours spent on senseless prose.
With thoughts so calibrated, perhaps I've overstated.
How this game has led me on.

But fashion automatic has got me lost.
'Cause all this excess comes at no small cost.
Charge it up and cash it in.
Do you think it's all in sin?

Words will come around and silence every sound.
In all this where can I be found?
This power generated has left me so frustrated.
How this game has led me on.

But passion automatic has done me wrong.
cause all these feelings come at no small cost.
Light it up and burn it out.
Did you ever have a doubt?

Where angels fear to tread.

The previous occupant of my apartment was a brunette! A woman preferably, but it could have also been a man with long hair. This is how I know....
While taking a shower today I noticed that the water was backing up. This has been happening since I moved in, but being the procrastinator that I am, I have been putting off fixing the problem. Today however I reached the breaking point. The tub was filling and not going down. I looked around the bath room for a plunger.... None. I couldn't leave the bathroom as I wasn't decent and people were over. I tried cupping my hands over the drain to make a Mexican plunger.... Nothing happened. At this point I knew what had to be done. Only a man who was sure of himself, who has balls, could do what needed to be done a "man of the hour".
I closed my eyes. Stretched my shaking hand down towards the ominous drain. I slowly insert my index finger . The mass my finger encounters is truly terrible. I struggle to hold back the regirge as I quickly pull the wad out. The ball of hair is the largest most disgusting one I have ever seen. Long brown hair... Definitely not mine. Along with a lot of other stuff. I'm sure there were several distinct DNA strands intertwind in the hideous glob.
Anyway, the drain works great now. Thanks to the work of one brave man who "would".

Note to self :

A foot long chili cheese dog with mustard is never a good idea.... Even if it's free. One must always pay the fiddler. Usually about 45 min after the fact.

More PJ

A man lies in his bed in a room with no door
He waits, hoping for a presence or something, anything to enter
After spending half his life searching
He still felt as blank as the ceiling at which he stared
He is alive, but feels absolutely nothing, so is he?
When he was six, he believed that the moon overhead followed him
By nine, he deciphered the illusion, trading magic for fact, no trade-backs
So this is what it's like to be an adult?
If he only knew now what he knew then
I'm open
Come in
I'm open
Come in
Lying sideways atop crumpled sheets and no covers
He decides to dream...Dream up a new self...For himself

JOY!

I found 45 dollars in a pair of shorts that I had left at the bottom of the ever growing dirty laundry pile in my closet. God just may exist!!! .... Or at least he doesn't always want to see me suffer! Although this may just be a set up for some disaster. ie with the 45 dollars (ok, one of the 45 dollars)I buy a rotten double cheese burger at Mc donalds and die an agonizing death....ALONE! Really the scenarios are endless.

Fat boy off roads!

Fat balding Mexican man likes to try and make fun of me at work. Mainly because of the fact that I'm going through a separation at the moment( at least that's what he considers my easiest target). "If you knew how to lay pipe like a real man, she wouldn't have left you". "Probably" I reply. Seeing that I'm not being bothered by his attempts he states " You see, I'm just a pimp". Coming from a guy we often refer to as "Shrek" or "Silverback"( as in gorilla) I tell him " I guess just about anyone can be a pimp these days. I mean don't they have a minimum standard you have to pass before you can become a pimp?". I look down to see that Shrek has served himself a large portion of eggs, biscuits and gravy from the cafeteria. I ask him if they've told him yet. "Told me what?"... "Told you if you're having twins or triplets?". " F#$k you!" he replies. He then proceeds to call me several other names while stating the fact that I'm just a little S#*t, and that I just don't get it. I turn to look down at the newspaper I had been reading before he sat down. Shrek then grabs the paper from my hands and begins reading. " You have to the count of three to return my paper, fat boy". He does nothing. I take his cup of sprite. "When you give me back the paper then you get your sprite back". He still does nothing. So I wait till he starts talking to someone else( with a mouth full of food) and I grab the paper back. I then proceed to leave the table. Meanwhile he starts telling everyone around that he's going to kick my ass.
The day goes on and every once in a while a swing by Shrek's work area and remind him of the ass kicking that I was promised and asked him when it would be, as my schedule for the rest of the day was pretty busy. He grew more and more upset each time. Around clean up time I see Shrek sneaking out to the parking lot early. I shake my head disapprovingly. Eventually all the tools are cleaned up and I head out.
On the way out , I notice a long line of traffic trying to make it's way onto the highway. "Must be another accident". I finally make my way to the intersection. I see an SUV had tried to cut around the little Honda in front of it, and had instead driven up the side of the Honda. A little old Filipino woman emerges from the Honda. she's ok but visibly shaken. I notice someone trying to get out of the SUV. Lo and behold Shrek comes falling out of the SUV. I Laugh. I laugh hysterically. Other co-workers drive up as well and begin laughing. Shrek covers his face in shame. ....... I must have laughed the whole way home.

Post office robbery!

Yesterday I stopped by the post office to mail off some bills. I walked up to the stamp vending machine to buy a stamp. As usual they offer single stamps or books of stamps. Having only 35 cents in change,(a single stamp is 37 cents, they also sell 23 cent stamps which is absurd because it costs 37 cents to mail a standard envelope) I am forced to go to the next highest price, which happens to be a dollar and 30 cents. So I deposit a dollar bill , a quarter and a dime. Sure enough, the damn machine doesn't want MY dime, so I am forced to deposit another dollar bill. The stamp booklet proceeds to fall down to the slot, along comes the change... Sounds like way too much! I reach my hand into the change dispenser, to find all my change has been returned in nickels .... G@# Damn!!! The last thing I want at this moment is to have to put 14 nickels in my pocket and jingle around the rest of the day." I got it!! I'll buy a couple more stamps with the nickels!"... I proceed to place nickels in the coin slot. Of course the piece of crap only takes one nickel and sends all the rest down to the change dispenser." F#$king piece of garbage!!!!". " Of course I have to try one more time. I reach down to the change dispenser...... My attention is drawn to the sound of two children running towards me. ( a boy about 4 or 5 and a girl about 7 or 8) They then proceed to push their hands around mine and both are trying to get at the precious nickels.
I, in shock, am also still trying to get MY nickels back. The boy having grabbed a few, turns around, grabs onto the crotch of my jeans and begins to hanging on me. At this point I'm freaking out. Not sure what to do exactly..If I remove the kids hands from my pants I risk being placed in a very Michael Jackson like setting i.e my hands on boys arm who's hand is on" that area" of my pants. I scan the line at the other end of the building, looking for signs of a parent, however no one seems to want to own up to the children. "I must make my way out of here fast." I thought to myself! Just then I hear the voice of the mother! She grabs the boy off of me and swats him, while scolding him in Spanish. The boy arches his back and throws himself on the floor. The nickels fall on the floor and another fight ensues between the children over the nickels on the floor. I turn around deposit my mail and take off. I think I'll try paying my bills online next time!

Wake me up when September ends.

I seemed to have lost all vision!! I have so much to do but I don't really don't seem to care if it gets done! This applies to almost all aspects of my life right now bills, home improvements , cleaning my damn room, homework, car repairs etc. It seems the world around me has torn up the carcass of my soul and taken the pieces off to dark corners where it will be lustfully fought over. (ok, a little exaggerated) The sad thing about it is I will wake up tomorrow fall back into routine and do it all over again.
I am incapable of having a good time! The other night I got of work a little early, so I thought I'd head down town to see a band or go to a bar. After a few minutes I turned around and went home to work on the electrical outlets in the living room. Sad!! I guess it would have helped if I went with a group of friends.

Bachelor pad

I recently moved into my very own room. Great! I as a kid I always wanted a room of my own, but now that I actually have one, I have no idea what to do with it.
Currently my furniture consists of a double mattress on the floor in the corner, a computer desk, an empty shelf, a TV, VCR and DVD strewn about the floor along with several piles of clean and unclean clothes. I also have an green and white checkered area rug in the middle of the room.
I have been trying to come up with good Ideas ,but being a male , I think I have a mental block when it comes to decorating. I was thinking of putting up Pearl Jam posters but I think that will just come off looking either like I'm hitting a mid life crisis at 25 or that I haven't grown up at all.
Anyway, I thought I might pick peoples brains and see if anyone had cool themes or ideas for a room that I could do "on the cheap". I'm sure I won't be disappointed!!!

Back to school!

Late for school.....
100 degrees....
Bolt falls of caliper...
F$#king car...

Balls to the wall

I've been trying to get the house ready to rent. Yes, that does require moving out, wich is something I swore I wouldn't be doing for a long time( gods! I curse thee!). At the same time the job I'm on has moved into overtime, wich means six at least 68 hours this week. I won't have a day off of work for at least three weeks!.................Why does the feces always have to hit the ventilator all at once?

sleight of hand

Routine was the theme. He'd wake up wash and pour himself into uniform.
Something he hadn't imagined being.
As the merging traffic passed he found himself staring down at his own hands.
Not remembering the change. Not recalling the plan. Was it?

He was okay but wondering about wandering.
Was it age by consequence or was he moved by sleight of hand?

Mondays were made to fall. Lost on a road he knew by heart.
It was like a book he read in his sleep. Endlessly.
Sometimes he hid in the radio watching other pull into their homes.
While he was drifting.

On a line of his own. Off the line of the side. Bye the by.
As dirt turned to sand. As if moved by sleight of hand.

When he reached the shore of his clip on world he resurfaced to the norm.
Organized his few things. His coat and keys.
And he knew realizations would have to wait.
Till he had more time. More time.

A time to dream to himself. He waves goodbye to his self.
I'll see you on the other side.
Another man moved by slight of hand.

---Vedder, Amnet.

One for the road

I just Heard a new song from the band Rise Against. It's called "swing Life away". I want to dedicate it to Heidi of "Cafein and me" fame. She has been a great friend, she also happens to be my wife.

Barbarian rides again!

I have finally returned from my self-imposed exile. Life has been crazy for the past few months. Anyway....... I'm Back!!!!

Fried Fish

After arriving home from work today, I noticed that I had forgotten to turn the lamp to my fish tank on in the morning. As I turned the lights on, I soon realized to my horror that all four of my African chiclids were dead. Their bodies strewn across the tank landscape, as if they had been stricken down by an angry Neptune. Their mouths frozen open to reveal the true horror of their final moments. Their once brilliant colors had been stolen from them and all that remained was the pale grey of death. The only sign of life left in the tank was lowly plecostamus. The bottom feeding sucker fish had some how escaped the clutches of death. It was as if the Fish reaper had passed over and upon seeing the hideousness of this fish, decided he was tortured enough.

I immediately began searching for the cause of this genocide. Had someone unplugged the filter? No! The filter was still running... Maybe someone had accidentally knocked some bleach or other cleaner in the water? No... There was nothing like that around. I leaned my hand on the glass... It was hot way too hot. It suddenly came to me. Somehow when my brother and I moved the tank the day before, the setting on the tank heater was changed, and the fish had slowly began to cook overnight.

I couldn't stand the thought of having an empty fish tank so I got the kids in the car and went down to the fish store and dropped another 40 bucks on some more chiclids. I guess all that's left now is to give the dead fish a proper burial and send them home via the great white porcelain altar.

Expanded vocabulary.

A few weeks ago while listening to Love Lines on the radio, they had an English woman call in. Somehow the term "buggering"was used followed by a brief explanation of the meaning of the word. My jaw dropped in horror. I then proceeded to laugh out of sheer embarrassment. I had up till then erroneously thought that the word meant "a beating" and had been threatening co-workers in a cockney accent that if they didn't do as I say they would get "a good buggering".

Hell

It rained again today................mud!!!!

I could live a thousand years in a world without mud.

Mud is depression in physical form....

It slowly will eat away at your inner joy, until all that's left is more mud....

Mud that clings to your boots like the hands of daemons reaching up from hell, draining the life from your tiring muscles....

Mud that soaks through to your socks numbing your imprisoned feet, while leaving a fowl smell. A smell so terrible that you could be certain Lucifer had risen from his pit and licked your feet.

Kings of Leon

A few weeks ago while listening to the local generic alt-rock station, I heard the DJ anounce that it was time to call in and win some tickets. I rarely ever win anything, but being a closet case optimist, I figured I give it a shot. Amazingly I was " caller X" ( that would be the number 10 for all you non-romans out there). The DJ then proceded to tell me that I had won a pair of tickets to see the Kings of Leon and that I was qualified for a drawing in wich one lucky contestant would win along with other things, a VW beetle, an apartment , movie tickets, concert tickets, beer. etc.
I show up about a week later for the schedualed drawing. I was one of about 130 other lucky individuals who got the chance to be enticed with all the free thirts, key chains, and energy drinks that we young consumers so love. After a couple hours of waiting around for the drawing they finally had us all get in pick a number and then line up according to the number drawn. I happen to be 80. Once the line had been formed, wich took a good 20 minutes, we were supposed to pick a key out of a bucket and try it out on a door. As luck would have it, I had no sooner said" watch the first guy in line win! but what are the odds of that?" to the guy next to me, when it happened!!! Needless to say the whole crowd was pissed.
The Kings of Leon finally came to town last weekend. Heidi didn't seem to impressed when I
let her hear a few tracks of the their CD , but she wanted to come anyway. It ended up being a kick ass show, one of the best live performances we had been to. The opening act "The Features" were awsome too. I think Heidi will be a big fan of King of Leon from now on.

Happy Birthday to me!!!

For all who didn't know my birthday was on the fourth. Can't believe I've been marooned on this planet for 25 years.
My bro and his wife came up from Houston to celebrate. We all went down to 6th street( the local club district here in A. town).Had a good time. We hit a bar where a decent ska band was playing, played some pool, but eventually had to high tail it once a different Band Fronted by the best 300 lb female guitarist that I had ever seen. The problem wasn't this woman's weight and not that she lacked talent as a guitarist, but her voice I have to say was definitely the most annoying sound I have heard long time. After we left we walked up and down the street, being that it was also Mardi Gras,there were throngs of desperate men clad in beads and expensive digital cameras hoping to catch their own little piece of "Girls gone wild". Sadly for them the desperate guy to girl ratio was so high that even the ugly girls were making them barter their best beads for a shot of boobage. We eventually finished the night of at coyote ugly's @ 2 a.m.
All that to say I had great 25th, although I'm still waiting for the great yet perhaps mythical insurance discount" that everyone mentions when you tell them how old you're turning.

Shitty car blues.

Oh joy!!! Don't you just love car troubles? Well for all who don't know my present hot ride is a '93 Honda Civic lx. "Lucky man" You may say. I mean who wouldn't give an arm or a leg for one? In some countries only after years of saving money and endless days of toil can one experience the sheer pride that comes with owning such a rare beauty. Sadly I have not been so appreciative. I have as of the past year and a half seriously neglected this faithful steed. I have for the time being put off changing the brakes, oil, airfilter, spark plugs, fixing the AC, alignment, tire balance and rotation, shocks, radiator, body work, and a broken window (Thanks to the Austin vagrant community). Yesterday on my way home I heard the awful yet undeniable sound of a failing cv axel( similar to bones popping in and out of joint very rapidly) I pulled into the driveway and looked behind the wheel. Sure enough I was right. This means I will spend my weekend fixing the car, hell I might as well do the brakes since they've been shaking for the past six months. God forbid that I should break down and take it to the Mechanic! That would only mean that the Man has won, besides I worked too hard for this damn money( and I'm about to work a lot more). After pulling myself out from under the car I glanced at the odometer 209733 miles not too bad for an abused little piece of junk. I guess I owe it one last hurrah!

We all live in the land of Gaga...ga?

So it starts..... I've finally got my very own blog and as expected I can't think of anything worth writting down. From henceforth all of you will subject to my shameless babbling and rantings of mostly useless information about my life. So...... Enjoy!!