I'm at a ross for lurds

These Guys Pointed me in the general direction....when I came across THIS. WTF?

Short or Wrong?...

My life, it seams, is a series of bad haircuts.

I should have known better than to step in. Must have been the allure of the clever national chain advertising. Numerous good looking,vibrant, smiling faces overjoyed with their haircuts and the new found confidence. I too could be one of those people! If I just had the haircut to match.
So I proceed to take a seat in the barbers chair. As I wait for the stylist(butcher) to arrive I notice that that she is conversing with her co-worker. My stomach turns as I relize they are speaking to each other in what I assume is Vietnamese. I foresee a communications problem so I painstakingly explain to her in my clearest English how I would like my haircut. Mama always said that in life "We don't always get what we like", apparently this is will be one of those times.
I soon found myself having to defend my preference in hairstyle. I cringe as she shaves of a section of hair that she didn't deem appropriate and then to add to my torture, have to remind her that since she shaved off one side she would have to do the same to the other.
I leave the chair feeling violated in every sense of the word. Yet still I find that for some reason beyond rational thought, I feel obligated to tip.

Turns out my cut wasn't quite "Super".

Mental Frustipation

.....For lack of a better term.


I would slay a minotaur with my bare hands for a backrub!

Oh well...

Cosmic Irony

Definition: The idea that fate, destiny, or a god controls and toys with human hopes and expectations; also, the belief that the universe is so large and man is so small that the universe is indifferent to the plight of man; also called irony of fate

This is my struggle: To see beyond the disappointments of today, the unforeseen debacle, the seemingly divine malice. To Trust: a simple notion, yet so difficult.
To know that everything will work out. To know that bewilderment will turn to understanding. To learn that love , though painful at times, is not weakness but the purpose of our existence. To live one day at a time. To enjoy the ride.

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

George Carlin

With just a look they shook
And heavens bowed before him.
Simply a look can break your heart.
The stars that pierce the sky,
He left them all behind.
We’re left to wonder why
He left us all behind

Dave Vs. The Javaman

I have resolved to give up coffee

Jamie and Heidi went out of town on vacation for a week. Heidi usually makes the coffee in the morning, or at least she sets the coffee pot up. Suddenly having been placed in the situation where I have to make my own, I became inspired to give it up all together.
I had actually been thinking about it for a while now. Over the past few years, due to my daily schedule, I've found that it's been an increasingly easy habit to get into. Don't get me wrong now! I don't have a problem with coffee drinkers. I just can't stand the thought of being dependent on it, or anything else for that matter. I often find myself walking out of the room when a good TV show is on so that I don't feel like a have to keep up with the next episode.
How hard could it be? I've given up a lot of things recently i.e sex,alcohol( right), sanity, dignity. Besides, I never actually liked coffee in the first place.
The first day I got up, ate and left the house. About an hour after I got to work the Javaman let loose. I was overcome with tiredness and spent the rest of the day in semi-state of consciousness. I found myself getting headaches in the evening from caffeine withdrawals. I really didn't think I was that addicted. I have found however, that everyday it gets a little easier. I'm now in my second week of being nearly coffee free, and have never felt better(RIGHT!).....Actually I do feel pretty good, dare I say I even have a positive attitude?

We'll see how it goes......

Dave vs. The Texas heat.

Up in the mornin'
Out on the job
I work like the devil for my pay
But that lucky old sun's got nothin' to do
But roll, roll around heaven all day.



It's been over 100 degrees outside and as luck would have it they have me working outside. To compound my troubles, my truck has been overheating. Which means no AC.
I set out to tackle the problem,I started by changing the thermostat. After the problem continued, I proceeded to change the radiator cap and then the fan clutch. Still the little truck continued to overheat. Yesterday I had to drive home with the heater on just to make it home. After pealing my sweaty, nasty, stankass out of the truck I concluded that it had to be either the radiator or the water pump.
One way to test your water pump is to wait till the engine warms up and disconnect the radiator return hose from the radiator. If water comes flowing out of the engine then you know your water pump is probably still good.*(water coming from the engine will most likely be extremely hot!!! It will scaled your hands) I knew this, yet I was so pissed at my truck that I didn't care.
After I eliminated the water pump from my list of probable culprits, I went ahead and removed the radiator and hand it cleaned out at a shop. I finally installed it tonight....All seems well. Now I will let the sweet conditioned air flow over my glistening sweat soaked body!

Start Wearing Purple

Close encounters

I am on vacation in Florida (been walking around in sandals and all) It's been great!( other than a case of poison ivy). Flew from Houston to Jacksonville and the next day drove down to Orlando. Met up with my sisters and some old friends for dinner and the next day we hit Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure. Spent about 10 hrs between the 2 parks. They have some awesome rollercoasters and 3D rides. I actually was able to get Brendon on a few of the rides( which is a big deal). Spent most of today sleeping and recovering.

Rhymes with Dave

There was a hermit named Dave.
He kept an old whore in his cave.
She was minus a tit and smelled just like s*@t
But look at the money he saved.

Summer sky.

Brown eyes gaze,her heart's been razed.
locked in deep,around the monster creeps.
Oceans fill,from the tears she spills.
Fears set free, she'll never come to be.

Stars falling from this summer sky.
By and by the whole world ignites.
Dreams to be. Dreams, not for me.
The dry earth quakes, she begins to wake.

Brown eyes gaze upon the cursed face.
The souless beast,on her will never feast.
For he has fled, his heart's been bled.
Lost is he in his trite to-be

Stars falling from this summer sky.
By and by the whole world ignites.
Dreams to be. Dreams, not for me.
The dry earth quakes, she begins to wake.

Brown eyes gaze, upon the earth awake.
This place so green, could not be a dream.
life set free for her will always be.
A hint to take...I will never wake.

Stars falling from this summer sky.
By and by the whole world ignites.
Dreams to be. Dreams, for me.
The dry earth quakes, I begin to wake.

Amendment

The previous post was a shameless display of low self-esteem. I would like to distance myself from the afore mentioned statement. The fault lies solely on a closet case of MPD.

....the paper it's printed on.

Not worth the phone call.
Not worth giving up for.
Not worth the jealous roomate.
Not worth my reputation.
Not worth what others might think.
Not worth taking a chance on.
Not worth the risk.
Not worth the morning after.
Not worth the moment.
Not worth the drink.

Dave Vs. the scissor lift

Got in a fight with the scissor lift at work the other day. Have to say the lift won this one, as I'm lucky to have my head intact. A lot goes through your mind when you relise you might be resposible for your own decapitation. Anyway I got off with a sore head and swollen ear. I had no idea an ear could swell up to such a size. Not to mention the bruised ego.

Hey there.

I must have lost my mind.
Must have been the overtime.
All the self-imposed worry and busyness.
How could I forget?

Then out of nowhere it hits like a Mack Truck.
The deafening shatter of everything else.
All is quiet.
Through what's been heard or said, I'm taken back.
Now it's just you and me.
You and me.
Life was simple.


Are you ever proud of me?

Why do you never sing in church on Sundays?
Why won’t you ever go all the way?
You’re floating towards heavenly hell
Hanging from the rafters like a church bell
You're light years away from reality
Lonely, and lost in a white Russian galaxy

Who knows what goes on in her pretty little head?
Who knows?

Dante's Inferno

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Eigth Level of Hell - the Malebolge!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Moderate
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Moderate
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Dave vs. the shifter.

While changing my clutch the other day, (see preceding post) I ran into one of many snags. This particular one involved the gear shifter. In order to get at the clutch one must first drop the tranny and one of the many step to lowering the transmission is to remove the shifter.
Removing the shifter would seem like one of the easiest parts of the entire process, and it actually is, but due to an error in the Hanes manual( It seems I wasted 17 bucks),I was led astray. After stipping out what I thought was the correct bolt ,out of sheer frustration, I ended up cutting the shifter off with a hack saw.
I proceeded to lower the transmission, change the clutch, and reinstall the transmission. Now came the question of what to do about the shifter. I came up with what seemed like a brilliant idea (ok brilliant for 9 pm on easter Sunday when you haven't had dinner yet). I would drill a hole in each of the adjoining pieces of the shifter, insert a metal dowel(in this case the shaft of an old screwdriver) in the hole, and apply a good metal apoxy.
It seemed to work just fine,though in the back of my mind,I knew it wouldn't last.
Sure enough, a few days later while getting on the interstate, I slammed it into gear and it broke off. I was then stuck on the side of the road and I needed to get to class. To top things off it sarted poring rain( Thanks Jesus! I know you might think it's funny.....Who am I kidding I would have too if it wasn't me) After digging around for a few minutes I came upon an old pair of vice-grips. I clamped it down on the base part of the shifter and then placed the shifter ball on the vice- grip handle. It eneded up working nicely. I drove around like that for a few days 'till I could get someone to weld the shifter back together.
Lesson learned?.....Don't leave home with out a pair of vice-grips

Dave Vs. The Clutch.

The clutch on my truck has been slipping for about a month now. It's also been getting harder and harder to shift gears. So I decided that this weekend would be a good time to change it out. I've changed a clutch once before on a 93 Honda Civic.
It was a terrible job that I spanned out over a few weeks. After a few nights of scrubbing the my grease coverd body at 3 am I resolved never to have to do it again, at least not on a front wheel drive automobile. This time would be different they all said. Rear wheel drive vehicles are a lot easier. .....So I thought!....So said all the experts!
The one thing you must never forget when you're considering a "do it yourself" job on your car is to always factor in Murphey's law, which in it's simplest of forms states: Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. I really wouldn't have a problem taking it to a mechanic. Expect for the 5 or 6 hundred dollar price tag. You know me always eager to save some hard earned money.
So I set out on what was to be a 24 hour journey spanning two days. 24 hours of sliding around on my back (which by the way now looks like I was a linching victim). 24 hours of rust and dirt falling in my face. 24 hours of busting my knuckles. 24 hours of a plethra of curse words which eventually just dumbed down to a repetative shout of S.O.B.
Lesson learned!! I will no longer atempt a heavy duty job like this unless: I have enough time, the proper tools, a good pair of gloves and a back-up vehicle.